“Behold, what manner of love the Father hath bestowed upon us, that we should be called the sons of God…”
1 John 3:1

I was reared by my biological father as the third of 10 children, in the rural south, during the ‘50s and ‘60s. I have a lot of fond memories of my father and I am sure that I inherited his entrepreneurial spirit. My mother was an entrepreneur as well. It’s easy to see why I just can’t shake the desire to be a business woman.

Because my father only received a fourth-grade education and had to struggle and work hard to earn a living, he stressed to his children and others, the importance of getting a good education. He was so proud of me when I became his first child to receive a college degree. Two of my siblings, later earned college degrees as well.

Despite the fact that my father demonstrated his love for me in many ways and was present in my life as much as possible, I still carried scars and baggage from my childhood. This was a result of some of his mannerisms and his work that took him away from home for long periods of time.

My father’s style of communicating was very harsh and hard at times. He had a gruff voice that pierced my young tender spirit. Even when he wasn’t chastising me, his tone of voice intimidated me and caused me to shudder. I tried to do what was right, because I didn’t want to hear that boisterous voice. As a manner of fact, this was his only means of discipline. Corporal punishment wasn’t his thing. And his favorite explanation was, “Because, I told you so!”

If that wasn’t enough, I was also reared in religion and legalism. Religion teaches that the way we demonstrate our love, devotion and reverence to God, is by abiding by rules and obeying regulations.

These two experiences, my father’s harsh way of speaking and my efforts to live by religious rules, skewed my perception of God. I saw Him as a big man in the sky with a hammer ready to pounce on me the minute I stepped out of line.

I didn’t see God as a loving Father. To me, He was a harsh disciplinarian. Even after my salvation experience, I didn’t have an intimate love-relationship with God. My mind-set was, just do as He told you to do and He will be pleased. Otherwise, you are in BIG trouble and worthy of punishment, and possibly sentenced to hell.

It wasn’t until I became desperate and allowed myself to become vulnerable, that the Holy Spirit began to gently and tenderly wash away my fears, soothe my pains, and heal my wounds. God the Father wrapped His loving arms around me and transformed my heart regarding who He is. This experience changed my perspective and I began to see God as a loving Father, one who cares deeply for His children.

Today, I enjoy climbing into my heavenly Father’s lap and spending tender moments with Him. I now call Him my Father, not just from my lips, but from my heart. He is my Abba, my Father, my Dad!

Your story might not mirror mine, but you too have a story regarding your relationship with your biological father. No matter how loving and caring he is or was, your father isn’t capable of satisfying all your heart’s longings, due to, his own imperfections. Only, our Perfect Heavenly Father can provide all our needs and mend all our earthly flaws.

God doesn’t waste anything, not even our undesirable experiences and pain. Since, He healed my heart, He now, uses me to minister healing and freedom to others, in the area of “father issues.”

Pray…
Father, thank You for loving me unconditionally. Teach me to release my biological father and to look to You for healing in areas where only You can reach. Pour in the oil and the wine that I might be made whole.

Posted by on Wednesday, February 14th, 2018 @ 12:07AM
Categories: Inspirational